Prioritizing Relationships During The Holidays
As we approach the Holiday Seson, many of us may feel a mix of excitement and apprehension about gathering with family. In today's polarizing political climate, most families have people with differing political opinions and this can make these reunions challenging. However, we can prioritize our relationships and maintain peace during the holiday season with the right mindset and strategies.
Prioritizing Relationships Over Views
Andy Stanley wisely says, "You are more important than my view." Let this powerful statement be our guide this year. Presidential administrations will change, but the people in our families will stay the same. Let us not damage our important relationships over a situation that inevitably will change. Let’s keep in mind that our connections with loved ones take precedence over any political or ideological differences. When we approach family gatherings with this perspective, we create space for understanding and compassion.
Strategies for a Peaceful Holiday Gathering
Here are some practical ways to keep stress low and maintain harmony during your family gathering:
1. Set Boundaries Early
Before the gathering, consider reaching out to family members to establish some ground rules. Suggest a "politics-free zone" for the day, focusing instead on gratitude and togetherness.
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2. Practice Active Listening
When conversations arise, focus on listening to understand rather than to be understood. Ask questions that show genuine interest in others' perspectives without trying to change their minds.
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3. Move a Muscle, Change a Thought
“Move a muscle, change a thought,” is actually advice from my dear friend, Susan, and it works. If tensions rise, take a break by engaging in physical activity. Go for a short walk, offer to help in the kitchen, take the trash out, take the dog out, or play with younger family members. This can help shift your mindset and reduce stress.
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4. Prepare Calming Techniques
Practice deep breathing exercises or mindfulness techniques before the gathering. My father-in-law must have learned this trick from one of his doctors, because he exhales for 10 seconds repeatedly at family functions. I have tried this trick myself and it helps. Deep breathing techniques can be used discreetly, or not-so-discreetly, during stressful moments to help you stay centered.
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5. Focus on Shared Experiences
Organize inclusive activities that bring everyone together, such as a family game night or a group cooking challenge. These shared experiences can create new, positive memories and strengthen bonds.
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6. Practice Gratitude
Encourage a gratitude ritual where everyone shares something they're thankful for. This simple practice can shift the focus from differences to shared blessings.
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7. Choose Your Battles Wisely
Remember that not every comment requires a response. The three questions you can ask yourself are: Does this have to be said? Does this have to be said by me? Does this have to be said by me now? Sometimes, the most helpful action is to let things go and redirect the conversation to more positive topics.
8. Take Care of Yourself
Prioritize self-care before, during, and after the gathering. Get enough rest, eat nourishing foods, and engage in activities that help you relax and recharge.
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Embracing the Spirit of the Holiday Season
As we gather with family this Holiday Season, let's remember the true spirit of the holiday - gratitude and togetherness. We can create a peaceful atmosphere that strengthens our family bonds by approaching our interactions with love, patience and understanding. Remember, our shared history and love for one another are far more important than political disagreements. As we practice empathy and prioritize our relationships, we can enjoy a truly meaningful and peaceful Thanksgiving celebration.
Arms open. Mouth shut.
Happy Thanksgiving,
Leslie